In most instances, me and the team keep our noses clean. We don’t run a meth lab out of the garage or sell heroin in the bushes next to the railroad tracks. No burgling. No assaulting. No texting in the car. I will admit to occasional lapses of lawbreaking. Sometimes we eat too much cake. I always look for cops before I speed, and sometimes I walk dogs where dogs are illegal to walk.

We all can run fast when need be, but I will admit to some run-ins with the law when it comes to walking with my dogs. Some of the wild land I love the most is illegal for dogs to visit, and armed rangers patrol at will. These are basically cops with assault rifles, and we have learned that it’s best to stay far, far away.

If you have this problem, one thing you can do is teach your dog how to be a covert mission agent, and ride silently in a backpack upon the command, “RANGERS!”

Or you could just try, “GET IN THE BACKPACK!”

If your dog is bigger than a backpack, then I’m not sure what to tell you. Maybe you can disguise it as a moose. If your dog is small enough, and has an understanding of clicker training, this is a pretty easy skill to train.

I used a clicker and treats to get her to race inside. If she is going to have to ride in a backpack on illegal hikes, it is something that she’s going to have to do FAST. So when I say “OH SHIT” she races to get in.

Getting her zipped in requires hoisting. I just tell her to act like a passive resistance protester, and that she needs to occupy backpack. Instantly, she goes limp, and backpack becomes occupied.

Otterpop understands. This is just for in case of emergency. The other dogs, not so much backpack riders and because of this, must stay home on sensitive, mission critical adventures. They got chewies instead. Only Otterpop is a good stealth agent.